I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Randomize
