we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
