I want to stick my p in your. b.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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