I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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