I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
