Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
We have so much sex to catch up on
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
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