you win again, gameday.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Randomize
