I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Randomize
