I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
