I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Randomize
