just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Randomize
