So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
