butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
only if we run a train.
done.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
