You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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