i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
