I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
