I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
