I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
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