i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Randomize
