high people should be assigned attendants
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
my shit smells like andre
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
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