careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
