You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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