Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize