im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Randomize
