letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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