I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize
