dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Randomize
