East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
