yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Just cropdusted the office
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
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