Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
17 year olds will be the death of me.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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