were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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