is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
