The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Don't tell me you're on acid again
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
