were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Randomize
