I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize