After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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