I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
