how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Randomize
