look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I have already put on my inside pants.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
