i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Randomize
