Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Randomize
