Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
