question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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