Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
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