Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Randomize