yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Randomize
