I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
