So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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