don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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