My friends, they love my intelligence
If that was your dad, he is hot
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
